The one thing that has become a constant in our work-life today, is stress. What’s even worse is that it is no longer confined to the workplace. It ends up creeping into our relationships, our personal space and our homes so much so that we often end up resenting our partner’s work and the people associated with it.
With both partners working, there could be times when you might have to handle your bae’s stress despite being in a difficult situation yourself; or just be there until the worst passes.
According to Dr. Jennifer Priem of Wakeforest University, who has been researching the connection between supportive conversations and physiological signs of stress reduction, a supportive partner has the power to take certain actions that can calm the nerves and reduce stress in their other halves.
However, what if your bae is so overwhelmed that he/she is unable to talk about what is weighing him/her down. How can you still be the buoyant force for your bae who might be drowning in work stress?
Well, here are a few tips to help your bae bounce back!
- Recognize symptoms: Judy Ford, author of Every Day Love: The Delicate Art of Caring for Each Other, lists the signs to look out for in your partner to know if they are under stress – “Snappy, cranky, withdrawn, moody, angry, restless, hyper, agitated, overly-excited.” According to her, if you see these signs of stress, then approach your partner and ask them what is troubling them. It’s important to make give your partner the confidence that you are here to listen and that you care.
- Listen: Modern couples often follow ‘no-work-talk-at-home’ policy so that the work stress does not affect personal lives but when it becomes overwhelming, it is important to vent it out. Let your bae open up to you about work stress and just listen without being judgmental. Sometimes, just being able to talk it out to a loved one can provide solace.
- Encourage recreation or indulging in a hobby: Suggesting a salsa class or a run when someone is dealing with work stress sounds ridiculous right? But if that’s your partner’s hobby, it might just be the answer to their worries. One of the simplest ways to deal with stress is to develop the ability to switch off. And a recreation activity, that you both can enjoy together, could be the perfect antidote to the stress your bae is reeling under.
- Be the judicious career coach: Though you may not have a complete understanding of your partner’s work, your understanding of your partner can go a long way in helping them out of a tight situation. Your knowledge of your partner’s strengths and weaknesses can come in handy at a time when he/she is feeling low on themselves. “Maybe, the situation is not as bad. Maybe he can truly just focus on what he’s great at!” A bit of pep-talk paired with your honest advice can make a whole lot of difference.
- Give space: Dealing with your bae’s work stress does not mean that you constantly need to be around them, monitoring every action. In fact, giving space has its own benefits. Sometimes a relaxed night out with friends or focusing on some me-time can help de-clutter the mind, bring a fresh perspective and offload stress.
- Don’t compare: Is your inspiring example really motivating your partner or intimidating them? When your partner is in a vulnerable state, make sure to keep comparisons at bay. Deal with the situation while respecting your bae’s individuality, and be sensitive to their problem.